Wedding Day: The Temple

It was absolutely surreal.

On August 29, 2015 at about 5:30 am, I woke up next to my mom at the hotel we were staying at in San Diego, CA. I knew once I was officially married, I would be sleeping next to Ethan every night; so I decided to find comfort next to my mom, the woman who created me and raised me to get to this point, just one more time.

Waking up, it felt just like any other day. I was calm and well-rested. I felt peace and comfort. I got up and took a shower, when there was a knock at the door. It was Joanna, the only woman I trust to cut or style my hair. The next knock came from Meagan, my best friend from high school. They came in the early hours of the morning to my hotel room in San Diego to do my hair and make-up because it was not just like any other day.

It was absolutely not just like any other day. It was the day I would kneel across the alter in a temple of God and commit to loving Ethan and standing by his side, as his wife, forever. And it was perfect.

(PS, Look at how he is looking at me, I love these pictures.)

I figured it would be kind of cool to split up Ethan and I's wedding day into a couple different posts so it isn't so overwhelming. However, before I do, I would like to preface it with a little bit of information about the temple we got married in. 

I also want to preface this post by saying that I am not trying to convert anyone or whatnot by writing this. I just know that a lot of people are unfamiliar with the Mormon temples, so I hope by explaining what happens with temple marriages, those who were not able to attend will better understand the process of things. Maybe by understanding this a little better, you will also understand why I chose to get married here and not on a beautiful beach in Maui :)

First of all, if you have never heard of or seen a Mormon temple, or you’re just curious, here is a list of all the Mormon temples with pictures. Ethan and I got married in the San Diego Temple. To learn more about that temple specifically, click here. 

A majority of people outside of the Mormon faith don’t know much about the temple, or what happens inside of the temple because we see the ordinances performed inside as sacred since they are directly from God. While the things happening inside the temple are not broadcasted on the news, there absolutely is not anything morally wrong occurring inside those doors.  Especially in today’s world, with social media and the Internet putting their own spin on things, special and intimate moments can be skewed. Instead of sharing them, we keep them between ourselves and God in an effort to keep them private and personal. After all, nothing but beautiful covenants are made inside the temple.

There are the Ten Commandments, as found in the Bible, that we agree to follow daily, but there are also other things we agree to follow. Some of those things I’m sure you’ve heard of, including a standard of modesty, a law of health, and a law of chastity.

Other guidelines that the Church leaders (known as the Prophet and Twelve Apostles) have asked us to follow are also important, but I will not touch on those right now. All of these guidelines are things that we are asked to follow every single day.

Members of the Church who are 12 or older and follow the commandments above are interviewed by a Bishop (the leader of the congregation), and if they are found worthy, they may enter certain parts of the temple to participate in specific ordinances. I will also not focus on this part of the temple right now.

To enter into God’s house and participate in the sacred ordinances I spoke of earlier, you must maintain a higher level of worthiness. Because you covenant with God in the temple, it takes a certain level of obedience to understand and accept that responsibility.

It would not be fair to allow everyone into the temple only to ask them to follow higher commandments that they are not prepared to follow and then punish them for not obeying them. Instead, meetings with the Bishop and other church leaders are set up to ensure that someone is personally ready to enter into the temple.

While everyone has the opportunity to enter into the temple, not every single person is living to the standard that God’s presence requires.  That, simply put, is why not everyone is invited to the marriage ceremonies inside of the temple.

There are special ordinances that occur in the temple, but since I am writing this to talk about a temple marriage, I will stick to that for now. A temple marriage is extremely similar to a civil marriage. However, the biggest thing that separates a temple marriage from a civil marriage is that a temple marriage bonds husband and wife together forever, not just until death parts the two people. We call these special, forever type marriages that occur inside the temple sealings.

Just like a civil marriage, there is someone who performs the ordinances, we call him the sealer. Sealings all follow the same outline, but I will just refer to Ethan and I’s. Those performing the ordinance (the couple getting married) wear all white to symbolize purity. Everyone else in attendance is not required to wear white, as they are not performing any ordinance. 

Ethan and I knelt across an alter as the sealer gave us words of advice about how to have a happy and successful marriage. I think the alter is symbolic because agreeing to marry someone, especially while keeping God a priority, means you need to sacrifice a lot to make things work.

The sealer asks if we are willing to commit to each other, and to God. If we both agree, which thank goodness we did, the sealer pronounces us husband and wife for time and all eternity. It’s pretty much the best. We kiss, we cry and we are all sealed up tight. FOREVER.

Then all of our family and friends who are in attendance come hug us and it’s done. The whole ceremony lasts like 20 minutes, sometimes more if the sealer has some real good advice for you. It’s quite simple and quite beautiful.

Since Ethan and I both wear all white inside the temple, after the ceremony is over, we both go to separate changing rooms where we can change into our wedding attire. While this is happening, the guests in attendance meet those who came to the temple, but not the ceremony inside (like children, members of other faiths, etc.)  and wait for us outside of the temple. 

That is why you see us walking down steps and whatnot in the pictures above. Walking out the temple doors has the same excitement as the bride and groom kissing for the first time as husband and wife in a regular ceremony. That's why we are all smiles :)

The fact that I get to spend every day of the rest of my earthly life knowing that I still get to be with my sweet Ethan even after I die fills me with so much peace and comfort. I think that’s a huge part of why I felt those same feelings when I woke up the morning of our wedding.

I know that, without a doubt, no matter what happens, Ethan and I get to remain husband and wife in the eternities and we won’t be separated just because one of us dies. Even when Ethan and I decide to have children (in like five years), they will get to be with us forever, too. Of course, they will have the opportunity to marry their spouse in the temple for eternity eventually, but a death on Earth does not limit our interaction as a family after this life.

Think about that for a second. How comforting is that thought?

The temple provides eternal families, 

and I am happy as can be that 

Ethan and I have decided to start our own.

Side Note: To learn more about temples, click here. If you have any questions about what happens inside the temple, please do not hesitate to personally reach out to me or visit Mormon.org for more information. I promise that you will get better information from me than you would googling things and then stumbling upon articles from people who are trying to put pieces together of a puzzle they’ve never completed.

I hope that if you are reading this blog, you know me well enough to know my character and know that I would never participate in anything that would cause harm or pain to someone else. Please ask me. I have first-hand experience on what happens inside the temple. I will be happy to answer what I can without mocking the sacred things that occur inside.